Our congregation has a “grand friends” program with seniors who help out in the Hebrew school. My son came home last weekend and asked me “guess how old M turned today?” I guessed 6 and he gleefully told me “90”! It’s a great program and idea to spread!
YES! I love this story so much! I've just learned the concept label "Grand Friends" from you and other commenters in this very thread, Kyle. I so appreciate it.
Hi! This is also not directly related to the essay (although I thoroughly enjoyed it, as a young adult who is both interested in the companionship of elder aunties and entering the phase of life where friends and acquaintances are starting to have newborns). But I just read the book Mothercoin by Elizabeth Cummins Muñoz, which explores the relationship between immigrant nannies, often from Spanish-speaking countries, and their “patronas” families. It’s a fantastic book that talks a lot about the politics and economics of care and motherhood, especially how motherhood becomes strained when capitalistic financial model and lack of childcare means that parents outsource care to nannies, who don’t always have the support systems to care for their own kids. Recommending for both readers and for you, Lisa, although I’m sure none of us need longer TBR lists.
The one thing I’d add is looking into Facebook groups specific to your neighborhood or area. I’m sure this is more common in certain areas, but I’m part of several hyper local neighborhood Facebook groups, and if an older person posted on there that they were interested in getting to know local families and starting an informal “grand friends” project, it would go over SO well. Especially if you were inviting both other older people and families to get together regularly at a local park.
A great place to ask about this if you don’t know how to start finding the groups is by finding your local Buy Nothing group and asking the admins there first - Buy Nothjng groups are full of people invested in creating community. Most Buy Nothing groups won’t have you post about seeking connection on their main page, but are often plugged in in other ways and can point you toward the right Facebook groups, mutual aid societies that have a lot of families involved, etc. Or, I’d search “your neighborhood/town” moms/mamas/parents/mothers and see if you can find a local moms Facebook group (as much as I’d love for it to be parents, it’s often a “mom” FB group), and post there. If you’re feeling too vulnerable you can often start by posting anonymously and just gauge interest and ask how others are forming community in the area.
I’d also reach out to your local Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts councils and see if they have any relevant programs.
Facebook is an excellent place to find community and to become a local. Our Buy Nothing group has a companion friends group that is about things that fall outside buy nothing parameters and they organize get-togethers, share info about community fun, etc. I've also learned so much about my community by searching for [my location] + birds or [my location] + garden. Basically any interest I have, I search for a fb group of people interested in that topic/activity in my area--or I start my own!
This is such a good idea, Tiffany! I am super social media averse, so Facebook literally did not even occur to me when I was writing this post about where we can go to start building community. But, like, DUH! I just commented above to Becca (the person who you commented to here) asking if I could feature a lightly edited version of her comment in a new "From the Mailbag" section of this week's Auntie Bulletin, and I want to ask you the same question. So it would be a little series of ideas on this topic (namely your and hers). What do you think?
Becca, this comment is SO helpful. I'm sorry for the long delay in replying to it. Okay if I feature a lightly edited version in a new "From the Mailbag" section of this week's Auntie Bulletin? I want all of my readers to see your suggestions here...
This is not directly related to your essay, but the word Auntification reminded me of The Uncling Ceremony, which you must see if you have not already. The button at the very end is so good. https://www.tiktok.com/@alex_falcone/video/7050197317105929519
Evangeline, that is the cutest thing I have ever seen and 100% on target for The Auntie Bulletin. I don't know how, but I vow that I will find a way to weave this in to The Auntie Bulletin one day. It's GOLD!!!
Our congregation has a “grand friends” program with seniors who help out in the Hebrew school. My son came home last weekend and asked me “guess how old M turned today?” I guessed 6 and he gleefully told me “90”! It’s a great program and idea to spread!
YES! I love this story so much! I've just learned the concept label "Grand Friends" from you and other commenters in this very thread, Kyle. I so appreciate it.
Hi! This is also not directly related to the essay (although I thoroughly enjoyed it, as a young adult who is both interested in the companionship of elder aunties and entering the phase of life where friends and acquaintances are starting to have newborns). But I just read the book Mothercoin by Elizabeth Cummins Muñoz, which explores the relationship between immigrant nannies, often from Spanish-speaking countries, and their “patronas” families. It’s a fantastic book that talks a lot about the politics and economics of care and motherhood, especially how motherhood becomes strained when capitalistic financial model and lack of childcare means that parents outsource care to nannies, who don’t always have the support systems to care for their own kids. Recommending for both readers and for you, Lisa, although I’m sure none of us need longer TBR lists.
Ooooh, this is a fantastic rec, Jenna, thank you so much! I'm going to check it out right now....
This post is an absolute treasure trove of great information, thank you!
Thanks for reading, Katherine! I’m a big fan of your newsletter!
This is fantastic advice!
Love the Civic Saturdays!
The one thing I’d add is looking into Facebook groups specific to your neighborhood or area. I’m sure this is more common in certain areas, but I’m part of several hyper local neighborhood Facebook groups, and if an older person posted on there that they were interested in getting to know local families and starting an informal “grand friends” project, it would go over SO well. Especially if you were inviting both other older people and families to get together regularly at a local park.
A great place to ask about this if you don’t know how to start finding the groups is by finding your local Buy Nothing group and asking the admins there first - Buy Nothjng groups are full of people invested in creating community. Most Buy Nothing groups won’t have you post about seeking connection on their main page, but are often plugged in in other ways and can point you toward the right Facebook groups, mutual aid societies that have a lot of families involved, etc. Or, I’d search “your neighborhood/town” moms/mamas/parents/mothers and see if you can find a local moms Facebook group (as much as I’d love for it to be parents, it’s often a “mom” FB group), and post there. If you’re feeling too vulnerable you can often start by posting anonymously and just gauge interest and ask how others are forming community in the area.
I’d also reach out to your local Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts councils and see if they have any relevant programs.
Facebook is an excellent place to find community and to become a local. Our Buy Nothing group has a companion friends group that is about things that fall outside buy nothing parameters and they organize get-togethers, share info about community fun, etc. I've also learned so much about my community by searching for [my location] + birds or [my location] + garden. Basically any interest I have, I search for a fb group of people interested in that topic/activity in my area--or I start my own!
This is such a good idea, Tiffany! I am super social media averse, so Facebook literally did not even occur to me when I was writing this post about where we can go to start building community. But, like, DUH! I just commented above to Becca (the person who you commented to here) asking if I could feature a lightly edited version of her comment in a new "From the Mailbag" section of this week's Auntie Bulletin, and I want to ask you the same question. So it would be a little series of ideas on this topic (namely your and hers). What do you think?
Sure, that would be fine.
Becca, this comment is SO helpful. I'm sorry for the long delay in replying to it. Okay if I feature a lightly edited version in a new "From the Mailbag" section of this week's Auntie Bulletin? I want all of my readers to see your suggestions here...
This is not directly related to your essay, but the word Auntification reminded me of The Uncling Ceremony, which you must see if you have not already. The button at the very end is so good. https://www.tiktok.com/@alex_falcone/video/7050197317105929519
Evangeline, that is the cutest thing I have ever seen and 100% on target for The Auntie Bulletin. I don't know how, but I vow that I will find a way to weave this in to The Auntie Bulletin one day. It's GOLD!!!
The build-up of the baby kiwi video just made it that much sweeter once I got to see it <3